The Daily EO: September 30th, 2012

Sometimes being uninvited is just what you need.  At least that is what I think.  This has happened twice recently.

First time was before I left Ontario when I was following up with a girlfriend about dinner invite – one of our going away nights.  She didn’t want to come.  But she hemmed and she hawed and them said “I’ll be there.”  I could tell she didn’t want to be there – I think I know her pretty well nowadays.  So, on the way home, I dropped by her place and told her she was uninvited – she was not longer welcome to come.

Sunday, same thing happened – we were going to have a picnic in our new place with our friends and their kids.  We were all looking forward to it earlier in the week, but soon Sunday arrived and four of us are sick, one is satisfyingly working at a project he’s wanted to get to for a long time and the three kids were just happy to be hanging out on a non-school day.  The last thing I felt like doing was dragging my snotty, coughing, aching ass downtown to sit on a hard floor with no furniture eating picnic food.  I figured if I felt that way, perhaps the rest of us did to.  So I uninvited everyone – please do not come to a picnic that was promised to you.  Yes, you too children.  Do not come.  Shoo.  Shoo.

Harsh it sounds I guess, but both time the responses were positive.   My friend was exhausted and had so much going on that a dinner out was not a pleasure, it was a burden to her.  We had already seen lots of each other recently, and said our goodbyes (such a lovely card she gave me), so another night?  It wasn’t needed and it wasn’t easy on her to make it.  What is the point of that?  It was supposed to be good.  It was supposed to be fun.  We had a good hug and said goodbye – and she kept the grip on her sanity.

And Sunday?  We ordered pizza, spent time together, kept the project going, and had a pretty good night.

September 30th, 2012 Extra-Ordinary:  Sometimes the plan just has to be chucked out.  There will be other picnics.

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The Daily EO: August 9th, 2012

I go through times that I find it very difficult to write the EO.  Not because I don’t enjoy it, but sometimes it doesn’t flow.  It feels like the fingers are as stiff as the words.  And that has been true for the last couple of days.  You’ve probably noticed I am consistently one day behind.

Anyways, sometimes when I have these blocks, I am just really tired like I was a couple of days ago.  Other times there is another culprit.  And this time it is anxiety.  Why am I anxious?  Well, we have no jobs, limited income and in three weeks, no place to live.  I think that enough to cause some level of concern.  But I can handle that.  But what I cannot handle is the lack of plan to deal with these things.   And I don’t mean that I need to find us jobs and housing tomorrow, I just need a plan of attack to deal with all the above.  It needs to cover likely contingencies, and provide actions for me to feel in control.

I don’t know what city we are moving to, I don’t know what jobs we are going to get and I don’t know the timeframe for these things.  Can I come up with a plan of attack to deal with all of this?  We’ve agreed to sit down to start a plan tomorrow – and I think it is because Emile cannot handle watching me vibrate any more.  I am a delight to live with.

August 9th, 2012 Extra-Ordinary:  I feel better already with only a plan to make a plan.